B E Y O N D T H E R E A L M O F W O M E N ’ S P A T H T O J U S T I C E
Women should not be attacked and suppressed from defending and litigating their matters. It is because of these discriminating experiences most women are hesitant to engage with the justice system in reporting crimes and defending themselves. This hesitation has had profound consequences, perpetuating gender disparities and grinding the very principles of justice and equality. Unreported crimes like domestic violence and honor killing remain hidden, hindering not only the delivery of justice but also fostering a culture of impunity for wrongdoers. As a result, this sense of alienation and detachment from the very systems designed to safeguard and serve the citizenry has lead to women’s erosion of trust in legal system.
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A topic of discussion and importance of high lightening a Global Issue, "Behind the Blindfold" as addressed by Miss Jassal's research on "Gender Discrimination in the Criminal Justice System." Multi-stage discrimination continues to manifest in other phases such as rape, honor killings, trafficking, stalking, sexual harassment, domestic violence, and more. Equipping women with knowledge about their legal rights and motivating them to report crimes can be pivotal in facilitating access to justice, a stark and sobering reality. It demonstrates that simply arming women with legal knowledge and encouraging them to report crimes will not automatically guarantee justice. Instead, women encounter multi-stage gender-based discrimination, ranging from their interactions with law enforcement to courtroom proceedings. Ultimately, this issue extends beyond the realm of women’s path to justice; it is inherently tied to women’s empowerment and agency. A fundamental element of empowerment lies in the ability to seek redress and assert one’s rights, and this capacity is profoundly impacted by the multi-stage gender-based discrimination experienced by women.
Further, when concerns about safety and security prevail, and the journey to justice appears arduous, this fear can curtail women’s mobility, thereby constraining their access to education, employment, and social opportunities, and eroding their agency across multiple dimensions of life. This research underscores the pressing need for multi-level interventions aimed at cultivating an equitable criminal justice system. These interventions must ensure that all individuals, regardless of gender, have equal access to justice and equal protection under the law. Such measures are indispensable not only for achieving gender equality but also for upholding the integrity of democratic societies and advancing the cause of justice for all.
"I do think that being the second [female Supreme Court Justice] is wonderful, because it is a sign that being a woman in a place of importance is no longer extraordinary."—
Ruth Bader Ginsburg
"Fight for the things that you care about, but do it in a way that will lead others to join you." —
Ruth Bader Ginsburg
S I L E N T S U B M I S S I O N
A harrowing account of a young Pakistani woman caught amidst an expatriate society in its most primitive notions on the role of women in marriage. A Story That Will Move You, Taking You Into a Different Realm, Where You Will at Times Come to Tears, and Other Times Applaud the Human Spirit; A Story That You Will Never Forget.
DEDICATED TO POLICE OFFICER ANGELA GAROFALO
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A special thanks from the bottom of my heart to Police Officer Angela Garofalo of the Domestic Violence Unit, NYPD 17th Precinct for her commitment to my safety. Without her backing, I was on the path of being destroyed and possibly killed during this ordeal. Her unwavering devotion helped me regain the confidence to take a stand against my abuser and reclaim a life of dignity and peace. For that, I am indebted and grateful for her presence in my life. Indeed, a hero and a savior.
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AUTHOR'S NOTE
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As I began writing in the spring of 2008, I was aware of the consequences of sharing my private life with the world. At the same time, I felt compelled to do so by breaking my silent submission and taking a stand. My goal in penning such a traumatic experience is to offer a platform for all battered women to speak up and seek out the help they need to break the vicious cycle of violence. My message will hopefully inspire them in their struggles to escape their abusers and be free by reclaiming and reconstructing their lives. I wish to pave that path to an emotionally safe and sound road to recovery through this book. My course to such a journey began by identifying with these three strong women: Tehmina Durrani, Kiranjit Ahulwalia and Mukhtar Mai. Their inspiration helped me regain confidence and the willingness to break free from violence. Through the lenses of these women, I learned what it meant to not forfeit one’s self- respect and religious convictions as each sought refuge to survive.
I firmly believe hope triumphs in the face of intolerance and the ability to transcend adversity. My book is a testament to how my hope led to healing by chronicling the pain and suffering I endured. I finally broke the deafening silence imposed on my safety and life due to cultural and traditional practices. That silence was marked with scars and, in time, those scars tell a story. They spoke of an inhumane treatment inflicted upon me that was once hidden in a futile attempt to maintain my family’s reputation and to save my life. With that, it is my utmost desire to deliver an inspiring story of a young and vulnerable woman caught in the complex web of an expatriate society while holding on to centuries of expectations forced upon women in marriage. These unchallenged deep-seated notions go far back in time to be currently upheld and rarely questioned, the impetus behind longstanding and devastating effects on the sanctity of respectful relationships and bonds.
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While domestic violence is a universal issue, its cultural expressions differ. Violence in the Middle Eastern and South Asian culture tends to be kept quiet and secretive for so many reasons. Breaking ones silence and taking a stand against abuse is considered to be taboo by bringing shame and humiliation upon a given family among the community they live in. And so on many instances, the abused remains silent by enduring and staying in an abusive situation rather than relinquish family and community support. Domestic violence is as a pattern of behavior in a relationship that is used to gain or maintain power and control over an intimate partner. Domestic violence causes far more pain than the visible marks of bruises and scars. It is devastating to be abused by someone that you love and think loves you in return. It is estimated that approximately 3 million incidents of domestic violence are reported each year in the United States.”Abuse constitutes physical, sexual, emotional, economic or psychological actions or threats of actions that influence another person. This includes any behaviors that frighten, intimidate, terrorize, manipulate, hurt, humiliate, blame, injure or wound someone. Domestic violence affects individuals of all socioeconomic backgrounds and education levels. It ultimately violates the fundamental human right to living in dignity and safety by resulting in injury and/or death. I refused such a threat.
President Jimmy Carter said It best when stated that, "Everyone has a right to peaceful coexistence, the basic personal freedoms, the alleviation of suffering, and the opportunity to lead a productive life." To all the victims and survivors of domestic violence in the Middle East, namely women in Iran, Iraq, Egypt, Afghanistan, Pakistan, India, Bangladesh and all those who suffer extreme beatings and torment. I believe there is hope in the most dire of circumstances through faith, courage and determination. I hope to inspire them through my message to escape their abusers, to gain freedom by recovering and reconstructing their lives. I wish to cover that path to an emotionally safe and sound road to recovery through this book.
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BY SENATOR IQBAL HAIDER SENIOR ADOVCATE SUPREME COURT, PAKISTAN.
FORMER ATTORNEY GENERAL AND FEDERAL MINISTER OF LAW JUSTICE,
PARLIAMENTARY AFFAIRS AND HUMAN RIGHTS
"When I was a student of Political Science, I was taught that the famous philosopher of France Mr. Montesquieu believed that "Man is born selfish". Another philosopher of Germany Hobbs had pleaded the theory that "FEAR creates balance in the society". I have made these references to draw the conclusion that if "FEAR" is removed from the society, than the utterly selfish human being turns into a monster. "Silent Submission", the book of Sehra is not so silent. It carries a very loud and clear message and lessons for our society and particularly women.
Girls should never be overwhelmed by the presence of dozens of roses, remember they carry many more dozens of thorns. Never marry a man who is known to be violent, no matter how handsome stud he may be. I have to cite a verse in Urdu "Taalug Roog Ban Jaye Tu Uska Torna Behtar". In today's violent and selfish society where even parents withdraw support to their children, every effort ought to be made to promote support to their education and professional training amongst the women as well as awareness of their rights to enable them to stand on their feet just like Sehra did. Divorce should no longer be treated as a stigma in our society, may it be Pakistan or Middle East or Western countries.
The NGOs working for women's right must promote acceptance of divorcees as an equally respectable ladies. Unlike the Western countries and some of our SAARC countries, in Pakistan we have much less protection of our women against all kinds of violence, because despite many efforts, Pakistan does not have a law against Domestic Violence to punish the culprit. Despite many efforts, Criminal Laws of Pakistan have not been amended to ensure punishment of the murderers in "Honor killing" cases, with the sentence the other murderers received under our laws. Despite many attempts, the Houses of Parliament of Pakistan have consistently refused to condemn "Honor Killing" in forceful manner or suggest ways and means to at least discourage this most heinous barbaric crime of Honour Killing, Karao Kari, Vani, Gang Rapes, Murder of Women by burning them in kitchens, Acid cases and many other forms of Violence against Women.
Sehra, I am grateful to you for giving me this opportunity to voice our condemnation against Domestic Violence and all forms of violence against women. Thank you very much for adding such a bold and moving book on this most heinous practice in our society, which is still unchecked and unabated. Your book would definitely encourage others from exposing the untold stories of violence on millions of women. This is a story of most houses, particularly in Pakistan."
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WOMEN PEACE AND SECURITY INITIATIVE
US Consul General in Karachi, Pakistan William Martin met with female political leaders and parliamentarians at the Consulate General on Friday. Among them were five female ministers of the Sindh cabinet. Martin congratulated them on the recent passage of the legislation on women's rights. The consul general lauded the group for their ability to work across party lines, saying, "The issue of women's empowerment transcends politics. Icommend that you are working together on this important issue." The female politicians and lawmakers briefed the consul general on the constraints that hold women back ni Pakistan, as wel as other issues they are addressing through legislation, including honour killings, acid attacks, and domestic violence. Martin referred to US Secretary of State Hillary Clinton's "Women Peace, and Security Initiative", saying that women's empowerment improves the society. The discussion over tea was a continuation of a series of meetings the consulate has held in recent months ot bring attention to the US government's commitment ot women's rights across Sindh, the rest of the country and around the world. These meetings have included a conference marking "16 Days of Activism ot Eliminate Gender-Based Violence;" and "Voices of Courage", celebrating the book launch of Sehra Waheed's Silent Submission, about her experience in an abusive marriage.
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REVIEWS
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"For Sehra who broke the silence of hypocrisy, that Allah consistently says he hates; in the dictionary meaning of Satan out of 3 – 1 is hypocrisy – So – while many misguided people around the world will condemn you – Allah will love you for following his command. I am very proud of you and can assure you that from here on you will find yourself transformed for a greater purpose. My love and prayers." — Tehmina Durrani, Author of My Feudal Lord.
"Sehra Waheed's brave and courageous story makes one feel the pain of all women who suffer in silence. Silent Submission provides a powerful voice to the voiceless. By revealing her scars and wounds so honestly, Waheed has begun the journey of healing. Many men and women around the world will feel that healing within the pages of this poignant book." — Salman Ahmed, Rock Star, Junoon Rock Band.
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COPYRIGHT © 2011
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All rights reserved. No part of this book shall be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, magnetic, photographic including photocopying, recording or by any information storage and retrieval system, without prior written permission of the publisher. No patent liability is assumed with respect to the use of the information contained herein. Although every precaution has been taken in the preparation of this book, the author assume no responsibility for errors or omissions. Neither is any liability assumed for damages resulting from the use of the information contained herein.
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This is a work of non-fiction and based on real life events. Although names, characters and places have been altered to protect identities, most accounts are based on actual occurrences. The incidents cited are not the product of the author’s imagination and are not used fictitiously. Any resemblance to such events, locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely non-coincidental. Material Certified By The Writers Guilt of America, West, Inc. Printed in the United States of America Published September 2017.
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